


Perfect Woman

by AgentOfShip



Series: Meet-Ugly fics [1]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Meet-Cute, Strangers to Lovers, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 07:47:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29292345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgentOfShip/pseuds/AgentOfShip
Summary: Written for the meet-ugly prompt "I overhear your list of impossible qualities/requirements you want in a person, so I feel the need to give you a piece of my mind but I’m realizing that I might fit your list as I argue".
Relationships: Leo Fitz/Jemma Simmons
Series: Meet-Ugly fics [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2151252
Comments: 24
Kudos: 72





	Perfect Woman

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by the wonderful @libbyweasley :)

Fitz threw his messenger bag on the ground, slammed his pint on the table with a satisfyingly loud bang, then slid down facing Hunter in their usual booth before pulling on his tie and throwing it on the table petulantly. The noise was much less satisfying but it still felt good to be free from the constraint. He took a long sip of his beer then let out a groan as he let his head fall back again the partition between the booths and closed his eyes for a moment.

"So...how did your date go?"

Fitz cracked an eye open to find his friend grinning at him. If the fact that he'd just acted like a child having a tantrum wasn't enough, the fact that he was back from his date on Valentine's Day at 9:30 had to be a dead giveaway. He just groaned some more and Hunter laughed. It was sympathetic though, not mocking. Or at least that was how it sounded to Fitz but maybe that was because he knew Hunter had had his share of bad dates back in the day.

"That bad?"

"Please remind me to not ever agree to go on a blind date with a colleague's friend ever again!"

"You say that and yet you never follow my advice when I give it to you."

Fitz chuckled as he shook his head. He took a few gulps of his beer before talking.

"Because you're also responsible for the worst blind date I've ever been on."

"What?! Wait... you mean--" Fitz nodded. "But you told me you liked her and you have so much in common, it wasn't such a bad--"

"Yeah, we do and for the first fifteen minutes, I actually thought the date might go somewhere. Until she started talking about her ex-husband and I spent the next two hours convincing her to get back with him."

Hunter at least had the decency to look a little sheepish.

"Yeah, thanks for that by the way."

Fitz rolled his eyes and drank another few sips of his beer. He was going to need more of it to forget about tonight.

"So how's your ex-wife-slash-current-girlfriend doing and how come you're not with her tonight?"

"Bobbi's working late, we'll do Valentine's Day next week. And you know, she said she liked you and thought you were cute and would have totally gone home with you that night had she not been..."

"...still very much in love with my best friend?"

"Yeah that," Hunter said with a wince.

"Well, thanks for letting me know, that... makes it even worse."

"Alright, I'm sorry. That wasn't my best idea. Now tell me about your night."

"Well, she didn't want to talk about work because it's boring but she also couldn't remember a movie or a book she liked that we could talk about. She wasn't interested in anything I like. Couldn't even listen to anything I said for five seconds without looking at her phone and cutting me off to show me pictures of her nephew who, I'm sorry to say, isn't even cute. She stole half of my fries and by the way-" Fitz reached for the red box in his messenger bag and handed it to Hunter. "Happy Valentine's Day to you because _she doesn't like chocolate and it's not healthy anyway_!" Fitz finished with a barely exaggerated impression of an American accent.

"Oh that's... that's bad, isn't it?" Hunter looked distracted and Fitz turned around just in time to see the back of two women sitting at the booth behind them.

"Hey! You already have one perfect girlfriend, focus on me and my failed date for a minute, yeah?!"

"No, I wasn't, I... Never mind. Back to you."

"Thank you," Fitz grumbled as he opened the box and picked another chocolate before putting it in his mouth. He'd gotten peckish in the subway on his way to the bar after deciding to forego dessert. That had earned him a pitiful glance from an old lady on the other side of the carriage but these were very expensive and high quality chocolates and he wouldn't let them go to waste.

"I'm not asking for much you know. Someone who takes an interest in what I like, who's got an interesting job we could talk about, someone smart, not necessarily genius smart but you know... who will understand what I'm talking about. Someone with a little sense of humor too."

"Is that all?" Hunter asked and Fitz's lips pulled up into a grin.

"Oh well, of course it'd be good if she was tall as well, with long legs, preferably blonde with blue eyes and-- ow!" Fitz cried out as Hunter kicked his leg under the table.

"Alright, I'll get us more beer and then we can start looking for a perfect woman for you before you go stealing other people's girlfriends."

"Sure," Fitz replied with a roll of his eyes, downing the rest of his beer before letting his head fall against the back of the booth. His eyes closed of their own volition. As if it was that easy. Maybe another beer wasn't the best idea after and he should just get home and salvage this wreckage of an evening by playing a little Minecraft or catching up on his shows.

"Who do you think you are?"

Fitz startled at the English accented voice and opened his eyes to find an apparently very pissed off woman looking down at him. The deep frown between her brows accentuated the freckles on her forehead and the gold in her eyes. And despite the severe expression on her face, her plump red lips caught the light in a very distracting way that had Fitz gaping at her for long seconds. And with the light behind her creating a halo around her soft curls, she looked like an angel. A very angry one.

"Uh...Fitz," he replied lamely. "Do we...know each other?"

She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. She looked angry _with him_ for some reason. It really wasn't his night.

"No I mean, who do you think you are, you and all the men with your unrealistic standards for women when you're not even capable of listening for more than one minute?!"

Anger flared out in Fitz's belly. "Oh yeah? Well from my experience, women are not much better listeners. And I'll have you know I'd gladly listen _for hours_ to someone who actually has something interesting to say!" Fitz cried out and if she could, he bet the young woman would have spit fire.

"Oh really?" she cried out even louder.

"Yeah, really!"

"Jemma, come on. Let's just get another drink," the other young woman started but the first one, Jemma apparently, didn't listen and instead sat down facing him, leaning across the table and giving Fitz another opportunity to see how pretty she was before she started talking, or shouting really, again.

"Oh of course, and by interesting you probably mean, talking about your latest car--"

"I don't even have a car!"

"--and going into endless details about its characteristics. And you know what--"

"What? Will you stop shouting at me, you crazy woman?! I don't care about any of that... well unless it's about..."

"About men that are obsessed with big engines--"

"...that new engine currently being developed in New Zealand that will supposedly be able to run on biofuel only but also consume half as much fuel as the current most energy efficient engine and--"

"Oh will you stop with the car talk? I've already had enough tonight and..." She frowned, looking confused for a second.

"Well that..." Her voice dropped down slightly. "...actually sounds very interesting!" She still sounded pretty angry about it though.

Her friend who'd been following the conversation with something between horror and amusement, tried to say something again but Jemma started talking again. "But that's not the point! I bet you'd doze off after a minute of me talking about my research on dendrotoxins and their possible application in--"

"Wait, you're part of the team working on dendrotoxins at SciTech?"

"What?" She was doing a very cute thing with her nose when she was confused, Fitz thought. And really, there might be something wrong with him after all, being so attracted to an apparently slightly crazy woman who'd just spent the past minute shouting at him for no reason. "I um...I actually run the team but h-how do you know about it?"

"Bought that science magazine by mistake instead of Big Engines Magazine so I thought I might as well read it."

The other woman snorted and Jemma glared at him but he could see her lips twitching as well and he couldn't help the smug smile that spread across his own lips. That was better than anything he'd gotten from Jenny during the two excruciatingly long hours that their date had lasted.

"You're brilliant by the way. Big anger management issues obviously, but completely brilliant."

Jemma's cheeks turned a bright shade of red and the other woman sat next to her and elbowed her. "See, you should have called Michael back to tell him that instead of acting crazy with the cutie."

It was Fitz's turn to blush although he couldn't help noticing that Jemma didn't contradict her friend. "Who's Michael?"

"The car enthusiast with a small dick."

"Daisy!" Jemma cried out and Fitz snorted. She dropped her voice down as she turned to her friend. "We don't know that, it's just a silly theory and it's not like it got far enough for me to..."

She cleared her throat before turning back to Fitz with something strange between a smile and a glare. "So you read the article in Science Today?"

"Yeah, your results are impressive. Have you already thought of ways to administer it? Cause I had a ton of ideas while reading it. There's so many possibilities besides a simple syringe. Could be a sort of gun or something smaller like a patch to deliver it through the..."

Fitz trailed off as Jemma's eyes grew wide. "Oh, you're an--"

"--engineer, yeah."

"Oh, that's-that's...that sounds really interesting. I'd love to hear about your ideas," she said, sounding a little sheepish. All traces of anger had disappeared and the way she was looking at him while still leaning across the table was quite distracting.

"So I leave for five minutes and you go and get yourself your perfect woman on your own."

Hunter put the beers on the table and looked between him and Jemma before sharing a knowing look with the other young woman, Daisy.

"Actually, Jemma here, was just shouting at me for being a man--"

"Hey, that's a gross oversimplification of what I said," she protested. Fitz raised his eyebrows and she looked a little sheepish. "But I'm still sorry. I might have overreacted because of a very bad blind date."

Fitz chuckled.

"Understandable love," Hunter said as he slid the chocolate box towards the two women. "Chocolate?" 

Fitz groaned. It was easy for Hunter to say that. He wasn't the one she'd just shouted at for no reason. But he didn't mind if he was being honest. She'd already apologized and he could understand her frustration. And now he'd really like to pick her brain about her toxin. 

She picked one with the blue wrapper, Fitz's favorite, and let out an almost indecent moan as she popped it into her mouth. "Oh these are delicious." 

Now that was a much better reaction to his gift.

"Yeah, Fitzy here is a very refined man. And then what happened?" Hunter asked as he sat down next to Fitz.

"They started nerd-flirting," Daisy replied, making Hunter snort.

"We're not!" they replied in synchrony.

"She just happens to be working on a very interesting toxin and--"

"--and I'm curious about his ideas for possible applications," she finished for him, giving him a quick, possibly flirtatious smile.

"Exactly!"

Hunter smiled and turned to Jemma. "Do you have a PhD?"

"She has two," Daisy answered for her.

"Do you like Doctor Who?"

"Of course I do, I'm British," she replied matter of factly and Hunter's smile grew wider as he nodded then stood up once more.

"What are you ladies drinking? I feel like we're going to be here a while."

* * *

Fitz slammed the door behind him as he blindly guided Jemma into his apartment. He would have turned on the light but he couldn't find the switch in the dark and he refused to spend more than a few seconds without his hands on her. Not when she was making those delicious little noises against his lips. He walked her to the living room all while managing to divest her of her jacket and sliding his hands under her blouse. She was all curves and silky smooth skin underneath. Absolutely perfect. Her bum hit the table sooner than he thought and she startled, which had the effect of making her arch into him and sending a rush of heat directly to his groin. 

He slid his hands down her thighs, reluctantly leaving her bum for a moment to lift her up on the table in one smooth motion. 

She giggled against his lips before pulling back slightly and looking at him fondly. 

"You look awfully proud of yourself," she said. 

He nodded. 

Fitz felt proud of a lot of things at the moment. That he had the presence of mind to tidy his apartment in the unlikely eventuality he would come home with his date. That he, in fact, came home with the prettiest, smartest woman in the bar. Scratch that, prettiest and smartest woman in any room.

But he settled for telling her this. "I'm usually not strong enough to do this but you're surprisingly tiny for someone so scary."

She laughed, wrapping her legs around his hips to pull him tighter, making his throat bob.

"Well, see? There's an upside to being with a small woman with short legs." He frowned at the slight bite in her words and she rolled her eyes. "I'm not exactly your perfect woman, tall, blond, long legs, blue eyes... Quite the opposite in fact."

"Ooooh," Fitz let out with a shake of his head. "Well, first of all, it's not polite to eavesdrop. Didn't your mother tell you that?"

She rolled her eyes again and Fitz gently cupped her cheek to capture her lips in another heated kiss that left her a little breathless. He couldn't help with the teasing especially when he knew he was right, but he didn't want to kill the mood either and let her believe for a second that she wasn't exactly who he desired at the moment. Teasing and bickering seemed to be as much foreplay to her as it was to him if the way she'd leaned across the table and kissed him in the middle of a heated debate was anything to go by. And he loved her for it. It would probably have taken him much longer to work up the courage to just ask for her number. And in fact, in the two hours they'd spent together at the bar, Fitz had had ample time to realize how she checked every box for him, from her job, her brilliant mind, her quirky humor and even her extensive knowledge of Doctor Who.

"But if you really have to know, I was describing Hunter's ex-wife, and current girlfriend, to tease him because he once set me up with her."

"Oh..." She blushed a little. "How did that go?"

"I helped them get back together."

"Awww," she said, tilting her head to the side. "I've really misjudged you tonight, haven't I?"

"Yeah but I'm willing to let it slide for another kiss."

She smiled that smile that had made his heartbeat quicken a couple of times that evening. "Oh is that all you want? Cause I was thinking of having sex with you." She slid her hand down the front of his shirt and he groaned. "I was even thinking of--"

He cut her off with his lips on hers, making her giggle into the kiss. A few hours ago, Fitz would have never thought he'd say that but this evening was ending in the most perfect way imaginable with the most perfectly bold and wonderful woman he'd ever met. Maybe blind dates weren't so bad after all.


End file.
